It’s easy to criticize toadies. They seem sadly lacking in self-respect, fawning over political, entertainment or sports figures who don’t always deserve flattery. Over many years, sycophants have garnered more than their share of public disdain. Their original, 17th century manifestation: Subservient assistants to medical charlatans in Europe. They pretended to being cured—by the self-proclaimed healer—from the toxic effects of ingesting toads, thus strengthening his claims for an audience’s attention, regard and money. Hence “toad-eaters.”
I should always remember to be careful of condemning others whose fundamental flaws are similar to my own! When I watch toadies do their smarmy thing now, I need to be careful how I might also descend into being a camp-follower, hoping to garner reciprocal favors or rewards.
I recall the times when, as a professional church worker, I over-praised a leader, when my gratitude went over the top, when I over-gushed admiration for someone in power. The favors I hoped for? To be acknowledged as one of their circle of acquaintances or friends. To be admitted to real or imagined inner circles. To have leaders remember me by my first name.
At this time in life, I sometimes wonder whether I have retained attention, admiration or personal influence. My toady instincts may still show themselves in awkward situations or when I’m in the presence of people more attention-worthy than myself.
Correctives are always available: Focusing on others’ wellbeing. Receding into the conversational woodwork so that others can shine. Listening carefully to discern what’s really going on. Learning from others in any interaction. Being grateful for the witness of those I meet. Staying satisfied with whatever respect comes my way.
I hope never to become a full-fledged toad-eater, and so will learn from the sad example of contemporary toadies.
That seems easy enough…..
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